Ep 299: Purple Rabbit

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“Alright dude, I gotta go home, fuck mat and do the show.”

There are fewer things in life more frustrating than a great plan gone horribly wrong.

I have had so much sex in the last 10 days, I fear my penis has run away.

If you see my penis, give her my regards.

I will not give in.

Ahem…
Your twat is red
my dick black and blue
I am an asshole
and so are you.

  • Of course this would backfire. This isn’t over… Don’t get it twisted.
  • Let me see your penis!
  • My balls are going to fall off… Both of them. Listen closely and you will hear Danni snort.
  • Having a prostitute girlfriend is kind of a good thing. Unless she is a smart ass about it.
  • Who got new toys and a beer from Erototoys.com? Danni recommends the purple rabbit, I would go with the fleshlight. XXXTREME DILDOS!
  • Rome would have been a cool place to live back in the day. Whatever gets done with one god? Jack fucking shit.
  • I will never admit defeat.
  • When your girlfriend sighs when she’s sucking your dick, that means hurry the fuck up. Is that in the katg book?
  • Hey Purdue pharma, I did my own little experiment on oxycontin, and my results contradict your results. We should really sit down and compare notes.
  • If you give birth to an opiate addicted junky baby, please kill the baby, and then yourself. Talk about a handicap.
  • Please keep your hair out of my soup. No, it was not pubic hair.
  • Please don’t ever put glitter lipstick on my dick again. Are you fucking twelve?
  • If you played a dead body on CSI, what would you want to have died from? Besides drug overdose of course.
  • You should thank British Airways for making you sit away from the child… Unless you are a child molester. Only a child molester would be mad about that.
  • You broke my nativity scene. It’s ok, I’m a hoarder, so I have more. Your place makes me not want to live in my place. You disgusting fuck.
  • Way to turn this whole little over seas skirmish into a full blown religious war. Putting coded bible references on high power rifle sights. Go god!
  • Why did you rip your friends testicles off? Better question, why were you fondling your friends balls? See, bro rape is real. I told you. Twist and shout?
  • If you want to rape someone and not get caught, rape the elderly. Otherwise, stop raping the elderly. It’s gross. Go Texas!
  • What Would Jamhole Do? You always have a choice. The smart ass option.
  • Go buy the Jamhole 250th episode. Remember that? It was our first live audience show, so check it out and help us pay some bills. See you at the 300th!

About Mat Lee

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...
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