Ep 304: Baby Killing Spree

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“I will make a movie about me, kicking your fucking ass.”

The more I read “God is not Great” by Christopher Hitchens, the more my mind is blown at how people can believe some of the things they believe in. It’s like they stopped caring about what was going on around them five years after they were born, and they haven’t looked back since. He is risen… He is risen indeed! I’ll make you a deal, I’ll start believing in god, but you have to stop using technology. No more cars either. You should probably all just start wearing burkas as well. And blind folds, I wanna see everyone wearing blindfolds. Girls aren’t allowed to vote anymore either, and we get to throw rocks at them if they aren’t virgins. We should all probably go ahead and quit our jobs, that way we can spend more time on our knees, worshiping the deity. AMEN! I’m in… I was at buns on the lake this morning for breakfast with Dana, and there was a table of people who had just gotten done with church. They were joking around about people who go to church, but don’t have faith. They thought it was funny that people would go to church just to be seen as believing in something they do, so they can be part of the super secret magic club. It’s saying, look how quaint these people are, with their wishful thinking and belief in a ghost full of holes. Death and taxes, unless you happen to be a tax exempt religion.

  • The guy that wrote “A People’s History of the United States” died. His name was Howard Zinn.
  • If you opened up a restaurant, and made it 18 and over only, that way you don’t have to tolerate sad babies while you eat, you would make a mint. Beat the shit out of your children, or don’t bring them out in public.
  • What is stopping you from killing babies? See, the prison system does work.
  • Legion… So is this what all Christians think their god would be like if it really did exist? Let’s make a movie portraying what would happen if my religion was real.
  • Hey Michael Bay, please don’t make nightmare on elm street suck. Please. If you want a movie to remake, remake transformers, and make it not suck.
  • Danni recites the lines from the movie Hot Tub Time Machine.
  • Why do you bring dogs to work, when you work in an office?
  • Check out the new spam. Who falls for this? I knew those Nigerians would fuck me.
  • So you see children, how powerful and generous god is, he has made all the trees and grass to be green, which is the color most restful to our eyes. Thanks god!
  • Why do you hate babies so much? You were a baby once, what’s the beef?
  • Haiti is getting back on track. It’s good to see they are back out raping and pillaging.
  • Duct taping a toddler to a wall. Yes please.

baby duct taped to wall

  • I’m gonna kill you! Because the devil told me to. God told me not to, so I did it during the day.
  • I wanna make money telling lies.
  • This is why you can’t watch porn and drive a semi at the same time. Streaming video rocks!
  • Do dudes ever dump chicks? How many chicks have you dumped? This is plan A, and this is plan B.
  • If you are going to cheat, you have to cheat at the same time. Check out our think geek wish list. We need a couple of pin hole cameras.
  • By the time I want to fuck somebody else, I’m not in love with you anymore. It’s nothing against you, it’s something against monotonous repetition.
  • Getting your world rocked, final destination style, with a huge fire hose. In 3d! I would post the link to the story, but google says it is infected with malware.
  • You know how I know you’re gay? Because you told the cops you’re obsessed with circumcision. Those wacky Australians.
  • Stop killing abortion doctors you crazy church fucks. 3rd trimester abortions, that’s veal. Those babies were dead already. I wanted the back alley abortion anyways, so there.
  • Emo Poetry 32 is up at the jamhole youtube page.
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