Ep 325: The Cold Knob


“I like looking at disfigured people.”

So it has come out recently that long time homeopathic whoo whoo debunker, beloved skeptic and phenominal magician James  Randi has come out of the closet at the ripe old age of 81. Now this is how you do it. There was no hypocrisy  involved whatsoever, no back peddling, no making excuses for his actions or self rationalizations like some of the other people we have read and talked about on the show, most of them holding positions of power within our government. Most of these people I speak of were being  controlled by those who padded their pocketbooks. Pretty soon, after so much of this back and forth shady pocket padding, we might as well have the people who did the padding in the first place do the voting, because obviously the people we elected don’t listen to we the people, they listen and vote the way those who padded their pockets most would like. So what’s the difference? It’s all a numbers game in the end. I am such a good liar that I fooled you all into voting for me because I made promises of all the great things I would do, but now that I’m actually in office, I’m going to do whatever the people who pay me the most want me to do. So if you want something voted on a certain way, just give me more money than the people who want it the other way. This is a classic example of the break down in our system that causes it to completely not work. So sure, why not vote no on some bill here and there that will end up setting the gay rights movement back years and years. Why not take money from people who would just as soon see you hanging dead from a tree than give you a helping hand. Why not join a church and give money to it, when in reality they would rather see you crucified than the lord they supposedly worship, just because you were born with an aversion to sucking cock instead of eating pussy. Honestly, it makes no difference to me, in my eyes, the world is just as fucked up for me as it is for you. Unless of course you were born into a shitload of money, or won the lottery or something, or you work in porn. Then you probably have it just a little better than I do. But that’s besides the point. I basically just wanted to say right the fuck on James Randi, that’s how you come out of the closet. That right there is how you fucking do it. We can only hope the rest of the closeted gays in congress will take a hint, and watch and learn how the master works it.

  • Check out A Scathing Review. At least check out the episode where they interviewed Keith and The Girl for the “What Do We Do Now” book. Good stuff. So, are you guys in a relationship too? Listen to the last part of the ep to hear me taking a dump.
  • Thank you to the idiots burning garbage for giving me a wicked headache. Stop burning things you aren’t supposed to burn, you fucking retards.
  • The new south park episode was fucking brilliant. Poor Tiger Woods. Should have thought that through a little more. You can’t keep a whore’s mouth shut, no matter how many hundred dollar bills you gag her with.
  • So we’re trying to take a trip to a nice hot spring with a private jacuzzi. Of course the one I had reserved is all fucked up. Oh well, we had a great trip anyways. We’ll talk about it Monday. I bet you could fix your jacuzzi if you weren’t living in the 1800’s. Fuck it, we’re going to Idaho.
  • Get your plans ready to go to Defcon with us. Check out the Defcon website for more info. It’s going to be so awesome. Vegas, here we come! I will leave a magician, and return a +5 black magic hacker wizard. Phear me!
  • Pay the fuck attention when we’re doing the show. You are no longer allowed to have your phone while we’re doing a show.
  • Hey 40 Days for life, why don’t you get the fuck out of our town, and go protest these fish. They are also having abortions. They are having way more abortions than the sluts here in the Flathead Valley.
  • Weird fucked up baby diseases. If you were thinking about having a baby, or you are pregnant, you might wanna check this shit the fuck out. Women have some disgusting things coming out of their cunts. Just saying… It’s not a god by the way…
  • Maybe if we executed the people who keep fucking up our economy, like they did in Korea, things would get a little better. I’m totally down with this shit.
  • If people are giving people aids, banish them to Haiti. Problem solved. I guess as long as you’re only giving ugly chicks aids, I’m ok with it.
  • People were meant  to have noses. Stop mutilating your women you crazy religious country fucks! Nice work, way to set an example of how awesome a religious nation can be. My finger is pointing at you Afghanistan.
  • This is the kind of motivation I like to see in my paralyzed people. I applaud you miss. Even in death, they didn’t think you could do anything. You sure showed them!
  • Hey, that guy robbed me on my way to go kill myself. I guess if I’m going to live, you should probably go arrest the people that stole my shit. You were drinking gasoline. That’s fucking hardcore bro-hound.
  • WWJD!!?!? Question 32, this is the last one. You had a great run. Thank you! I’ll just kill kittens. Problem solved.
  • Thanks for showing us how awesome Michigan can be Berger! Here’s a story about the place stinking like shit, and here is a story about meth being found all over the place. OOOooooh Meth!!!
  • Idiots are everywhere and here is proof. Stay tuned for more, because people are idiots.
  • All your wep are belong to me.

About Mat Lee

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...
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