Ep 492: Corrective Rape

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“I’d rather do cocaine than sugar.”

Just plowing right through this life, getting shit done, kicking virtual ass, and taking names. Not even taking them, just writing them down, putting them to faces, and then silently tracking you everywhere you go. In the background like a process, infinitely humming along, executing line after line of neural network e-fleshtric hybrid synapse code. The source of all we perceive, all the signal input our gray matter computes into recognizable patterns. Over and over and over again. Do you see the pattern? Can you predict future events by analyzing the signal pattern? Probably not. But could you imagine? Would you imagine? Should you get embarrassed at the first light of uranium going meltdown critical? Get the fuck out. That’s not even close to how we roll the dice. Shooting the craps with god and Darwin, still arguing over that age old question of who is the greatest thinking mind in the universe…

  • Welcome back after missing the Monday episode, it feels good to be back in the saddle again.
  • I finally finished the book “In Search of Time” by Dan Falk. It was pretty fucking mind blowing. The next book on the Jamhole book list is World War Z by Max Brooks.
  • If you want to see why there was no show, the pics are here and here. I love you so much, I got your car out without having to do any digging. I was kind of a dick, but I saved the day in the end. That’s all that matters. If you have ever gone up that road, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
  • Yeah, this goes on for a good thirty minutes or so. Unless you like listening to our therapy sessions, I suggest you fast forward. Oh, and I cooked dinner, AND did the show notes. Neither here nor there, just getting it documented for life archival reasons.
  • If anyone wants to buy a house with some land and a really awesome fucking driveway, let me know.
  • Huge big ups to Chad for being a better boyfriend than I. It takes all of us to make the world go around. All of us.
  • Join the Jamhole No Care Club! If you don’t give a shit like we don’t give a shit, then send a donation of ten dollars and YOU TOO can become a member. Not only am I the president of the Jamhole No Care Club, but I’m also a client.
  • Ok, the back and forth ends almost exactly thirty minutes in. On with the meat and potatoes of the show. Did you know that just snorting pixie sticks and smarties isn’t cutting it anymore for our nations’ children? Damn straight, the kids in Forest Hills Michigan are apparently pretending to smoke smarties. I blame poor parenting. Hey, why do you have a maggot coming out of your nose?
  • How do you fix a lesbian? With corrective rape of course, DUH! Hey, is there any way you can fix her homosexual orientation? Of course, get her prepped for some corrective rape. God bless South Africa!
  • Holy good god man, what the fuck happened to your face? I mean fuck, I like what you’ve done there with the glasses. It makes you look like you actually have eyes under there. My oh my how the medical profession has come a long way. From making your tits bigger to giving this dude a full on fucking face! Amazing. What has prayer done for you lately?
  • Another “god” is born in China. Hey China, what’s up with you and giving birth to weird two headed baby things? You keep that up pretty soon you’re going to run out of people. Trust, no one wants to have sex with a two headed baby thing… OR DO THEY?
  • France rounding off the top of the show something proper like, we have a woman who admits to suffocating eight newborns. What a way to go. Maybe if you would stop having babies, you could stop killing them. Yea, I know that’s a lot to ask.
  • When pets attack… Unless you have a crazy big dog or a tiger or some shit, you probably don’t need to pull a knife. I mean unless you were sure you were going to lose the fight, then, it’s survival at all cost.
  • Another episode all done and done. Thank you everyone for joining us. Please go write us a five star review on Itunes. This is important right now. Also help us get to 500 likes for episode 500. Share and share a LIKE! Pass it on to 10 people this week, and tell them to do the same. If you loved us you would. Also while you’re on there, be sure to check out the events section. We’re having our third annual Jamhole live party show! Saturday August 13th is the date, right here in beautiful Kalispell Montana. Join the forums if you want to participate in the community. Text me at 406.848.1739 or leave a message for the show at 406.204.4687. You can always email info@thejamhole.com or leave a comment below. See you Friday!