“I need fur to express my inner being.”
So it’s that time of year again, when the president addresses this great nation of ours. What I find very amusing about this whole thing, is that he keeps saying things we already know. Let’s get back to work he says. Hey Obama, we’ve been working this whole time, where the fuck have you been? We work our fucking asses off, just to break even. That’s fun right? You say people shouldn’t go bankrupt just because they chose to go to college right? So quit talking, and do something about it. You are the president after all. Now of course, it’s easy to get up in front of the country and talk all this shit about what needs to be done, and how to make things better, but that’s all it is. It’s just talk. Put your money where your mouth is so to speak, and start doing things to make us proud that you are the president. Because I don’t know if you know this or not, but where I live, up here in Montana, people aren’t exactly behind you. If they are behind you, it’s to kick you off the cliff you’ve led us to the top of. The majority of the American people are blind, religious sheep, and if you go over that cliff, you will bring them all with you, which in hindsight, may not be that bad of a thing. You say we need healthcare reform right? So let’s fucking do it! I’m sure by now all of the major health insurance companies have enough money stashed away to live the rest of their lives very comfortably, which is more than I can say for those of us who gave them that money in the first place. It’s the same with the auto industry. They should have made more than enough money in profits since the auto boom back in the day to carry their businesses through this low point. But then they get all this bail out money. That’s pretty fucked up. Maybe, instead of giving them even more money, why not look into the reason they are broke in the first place, then fix it. You can keep on giving them money, but if they keep on spending it on private planes, hookers and blow, it’s not going to help anything. So yea, I’m just saying, fix the shit you say your going to fix, or get the fuck out of the way and let someone else do it.
- Steve Jobs shows how sick he really is by unveiling the iPad. Remember the mad tv iPad? We do. Let’s make an iPod, but BIGGER. Because we are all getting bigger. It’s an iPod for fat fuck people. At&t huh? Really? Do they even have any towers left? Because from their service, you wouldn’t think so. I would of course like to have one for around the house, so you can send mine to the PO Box. It’s ok, I’ll wait for the android tablet.
- A quick little end spoiling review from the great Keith Malley’s film debut, She’s Crushed. I checked just now, and you are only down 15% Keith. Keep your head up.
- A huge thanks to MDS for sending us his $.05 Verizon credit. We can now finally both quit our day jobs. Thank you!
- WWJD? This one might be a little long, but hey, you take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have…
- Hey Danni, explain to us what the state of the union is please. Thank you. By the by, are people where you live as unhappy with Obama as they are where I live? If you hear anything about that in your day to day passing, email email@example.com and let us know. I’m curious.
- You can judge how good a company’s product is by how much they outsource their tech support. If a company doesn’t have any tech support, maybe they don’t need it. If you can’t figure out your nexus one, send it to me, and go buy a jitterbug.
- Did you know we live in a world where we have actual werewolves? I didn’t either until we did this news story. It’s kind of like that tv show, Being Human. Pretty entertaining sometimes. Danni really likes it. Don’t make fun of my FURsonna. I am a nine tail fox. Have fun in your padded cell Wolfy Blackheart. If you need to get brains out of a skull, just ask Danni.
- Do you have a baby you don’t want anymore? Toss it off the overpass. Not my first choice, but hey, whatever works.
- Would you rather see a toddler run over, or a dog? I nominate Danni for humanitarian of the year.
- I hear famous daves is hiring. Hahahaha, that’s rich.
- Check out my fat baby. This is how you get your baby to lose those unsightly pounds. As long as my baby look good, that’s the important thing. I love people. Why are they called “Foster” kids? Just curious. Was Foster the first unwanted child ever? It comes from the Latin “Biggus Mistakus.”
- Do you have cartoony porn on your phone? Is the porn of a character who might not exactly be of age? Well, you might be going to jail, without passing go, or collecting $200. Let’s take a journey through Danni’s cartoon porn collection. We are all fucked. Should have emptied your recycle bin dude.
- I forgot to mention this on the show, but Emo Poetry ep 32 is available on thejamhole.com/youtube.