TJH 913: Zero Restraint

The Jamhole Ep 913
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“I’m sorry, I love you.”

Episode 913 of the Jamhole right on schedule, because we make the schedule. This one was a tough one but we power through because we’re god damn professionals, and Mr. Norris would have wanted it that way.

Have we been enjoying the monologues? I’ll probably fire half the writers that way we keep the other half hungry and writing good shit.

Bar Keepers Week 300
Bar Keepers Week 300

I finally hit 300 weeks in a row keeping my bars for the Bar Keepers. The homie Blonju made this cool video, it’s on the Patronus, and probably Instagram.

America Chuck Yea
America Chuck Yea

The universe finally filed the paperwork. Chuck Norris, long considered biologically optional, has died at 86. Not just an actor, but a meme that somehow made him more real than reality. Also, I need this chucking shirt in my life.

Iran War
Iran Away

I guess things are escalating in Iran? Who saw that coming? Here’s a bunch of depressing news about it.

Alien Abduction Day
Alien Abduction Day

Happy Alien Abduction Day! A day to celebrate people being “abducted,” or, more realistically, misremembering trauma but with better branding.

World Happiness Report
World Happiness Report

Let’s go through the World Happiness Report. It turns out monetizing insecurity has side effects. Who could’ve predicted that?

Mosquito Flight Path Science
Mosquito Flight Path Science

Let’s talk about mosquitos. We all know they suck, but do we know the path they take to get to sucking? We do now, thanks to this new ass science.

Cleaning Distractions
Cleaning is FUN

I don’t want to call this roommate beef because I know sometimes she can’t help it, but I also know she won’t read this, so roommate beef it is. Actually, this is more of a solution to the problem, so I’m being helpful. 5 ways to keep your fucking house clean.


Episode 913 TLDR:
Chuck Norris died, proving even memes have an expiration date. The world is sliding further into chaos with Iran tensions and rising costs, while we celebrate Alien Abduction Day because reality clearly isn’t weird enough.

The World Happiness Report confirms social media is making everyone miserable, science studies mosquitoes like they’re tiny flying serial killers, and somehow we still think cleaning your house needs a 5 step system.

Also, Bar Keepers hits 300 weeks because apparently consistency is a personality trait now.


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Graftwerks
Graftwerks
End of an Era
End of an Era
mat lee greatest hits
Greatest Hits
Project Survival
Project Survival
Virus Diaries
Virus Diaries
Plan B
Plan B

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By Finn

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...