Ep 361: Beautiful Flower

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“You’re shameful about all the wrong things.”

When we have such a beautiful day as we did today here in the Big Sky country, I almost forget what a messed up world we live in. Lucky for me, and all the other pessimists out there, the internet is right there waiting to remind us of how fucked up shit can get. Take this story for example. This 54 year old “gentleman” in Brazil was arrested and accused with fathering eight children with his two eldest daughters. The sad thing is, this isn’t the first time we’ve come across a person like this. Do you all remember the story last year about Josef Fritzl, the Austrian father who raped his daughter and had seven children by her and one miscarriage? Of course you do. So maybe we have a copy cat here, or perhaps this is just something that happens every now and then. So back to the main story, this crazy fuck fathered seven children with his 29 year old daughter, and one child with his 31 year old daughter. I guess you gotta switch it up every now and then so you don’t wreck the puss right? The police have also confirmed that two other of his children / grandchildren were also sexually abused. Of fucking course they were. You know what, I wouldn’t be surprised if it comes out that he was sexually abused himself. That always makes for a great excuse. I think this one is a bit far too past the “I was drunk” excuse, but you are never far too past the “I was molested” excuse. Just ask the Catholic church! Anyways, this is what I like to call the point of no return. There is nothing you can really do for this “family” except to put them out of their misery. ALL OF THEM. Because if you don’t, you know the cycle will repeat itself, over and over and over again. That’s the circle of life. This guy should have made himself a little Human Centipede! That was for you Ward.

  • Hey, do you guys have a call in phone number? What is it? 406.204.4687. Oh right, I would know that if you would say it slower you fucking asshole.
  • A huge thanks to Shaun for passing me part of his sickness. Go buy your own mouth wash you son of a bitch.
  • Be thankful that I use girls body wash. Otherwise I would smell like balls and asshole. Instead, I smell like a wet dream. You’re welcome.
  • Did you just shit your pants? Yes, he did. We’ll give Shaun a chance to defend himself on the Wednesday episode.
  • A quick run down of the new episode of True Blood. I wanna do bad things to you!
  • Chicks should always be kissing, that’s the law of the land here in Jamholia.
  • Thank you fence for putting a nice size hole in my shorts. So, can you sew?
  • I would appreciate it if you could stop farting in my presence. Have some fucking shame. Thank you.
  • I don’t care how poor a man is, if he has family, he’s rich. Go tell that to everyone with a family standing in the welfare line.
  • When does a company ever send you an email with your password in the attachment? That’s right dummy, never.
  • PMSx365 Best plate ever. What a bitch!
  • If your girlfriend likes to sing Reba, she might be a redneck…
  • Charlieclown is in the lead on the Jamhole donate leader board. Our server bill is due, so if you wanna help out with that, hit up the donate page. Thanks!
  • Another problem with oil going places it shouldn’t. At least it’s just Utah right? Nice job Chevron!
  • Because of this, we now own Afghanistan. I called that shit! Is the war worth it now? Of course not, but it’s a good start.
  • I’m so hungry, it’s either my brother, or his hamster. His AmHamster. Thank you. I can’t believe he microwaved it. That’s just going to dry it all out. Hot pockets! Does anyone remember Joe Cartoon?
  • Drinking your OWN pee pee, to cover up the fact that you were doing drugs. That’s not quite how it works, but you get an A for effort.
  • Return of the diaper boy! I swear, I was just trying to show the kids it was ok to wear diapers. I was doing it for the kids! Toddler sized pampers are where it’s at!
  • The week after pill. I’m in! This is more like Plan C. They should just start putting it in the water, you know, for the kids.
  • So apparently we are no longer dating, or living together. Don’t look at me, look at her. It’s just for the paper work.
  • Talk about putting your smarts to work for you. These two NERDS wrote a computer program to kill themselves. Nice job! What a couple of Bromeo’s.
  • I podcast and I bang chicks, that’s kinda my thing you could say.
  • How do you know what PCP smells like? Never mind… I found it on the playground. Why don’t you show mommy where that playground is.
  • Like I said, if you enjoy the show, help us pay for the show. If you can’t afford to do that, at least help spread the word.

By Finn

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...

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