Ep 438: The Grid

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“I paid to let somebody see me cry for two minutes.”

Ok then, these are the notes. But first, these are my hopes. I hope everyone had a merry Christmas. I hope we are all looking forward to the new year with high hopes and dreams of greatness. I hope that at least half of you are actually motivated enough to follow through and make those dreams of greatness a great reality. I hope you all went completely broke buying shit that no one really wanted in the first place just because for some reason you felt like you had to. I hope we all went that much more into debt trying to impress our significant others, when in reality our others could give a fuck less. Ok, well some of them at least. The good ones… You know who you are. I hope you all made at least one death threat to an in-law. I hope that some of you actually followed through with said death threat. I hope all of your airport experiences were cold, stiff, and awkwardly uncomfortable. I hope the lines were long and the tickets not worth the hassle you went through to board that plane. I hope we all kept in mind those less fortunate, for at least a split second as you threw a quarter into the bucket so the lady could feel like she actually did some good standing there annoying everyone with that incessant ringing. I hope that quarter does more for whoever ends up with it than it ever did for you. I hope you ate so much food the only way to possibly consume anymore was to excuse yourself from the table, wobble over to the toilet, and throw up. That’s much better, now what’s for dessert? I hope you cherish the time you have on this planet, and I really hope you don’t get too distracted with all this shiny shit. It’s poison. Trust me. I hope you don’t crash your car trying to hurry home in the dead of winter because you went to the strip club when you said you were just running to the store. Damn those addictions! I hope your Oxycontin dealer didn’t rip you off again by charging you a buck a milligram. After all, it is the holidays! I hope you know enough to know when to say when. And if you don’t, I hope you don’t take any innocents with you. My, that’s a very destructive path your venturing down. Watch out for that last step…

  • The Jamhole podcast, broadcasting live from beautiful sunny downtown Kalispell Montana. 406 represent!
  • When it snows, you have to drive better, or I will call the highway zamboni on that ass.
  • Tonight was a Lunar Eclipse! We didn’t get to see it because of the clouds until like 2 am. But it was fucking awesome.
  • $900 phone bill, check. Crash my car… Check. Got a wicked tooth infection. Check. So how’s your life?
  • Hey, does your face hurt?
  • So I paid you $63 and you basically told me to go fuck myself. Thanks health care!
  • Let me take a moment here to tell all of the children that this is why you should take good care of your teeth. Don’t end up like Danni.
  • Welcome to the Grid. Tron Legacy in 3D was pretty fucking cool. Wrap n Roll in Kalispell is so fucking good.
  • I didn’t choose to get born into the family that I did. But I sure am thankful.
  • Dana, if I bought you a Nintendo, would you let me get rid of your Barbie car?
  • Yea, I saw it twice. I’m that much of a geek. The seats the second time around were much better.
  • Here’s a little Jamhole update about the fool that got a gun past those sly TSA dogs.
  • Thanks to the guys over at Sporkroast for sending some cash our way for little two year old Sam. If you guys want to help out, donate some cash. For the month of December everything we get is going to him.
  • What has WikiLeaks done after all? Hmm, well let’s see… Basically governments are scum bags and do fucked up shit to each other all the time. Thanks Berger!
  • Talk about a fucking waste. You gotta be hard up to rob the Toys for Tot’s trailer. I love how they “knew” what they were looking for. $15,000 worth of toys GONE! Damn… I know someone who is getting coal for Christmas. Maybe that’s what you get for turning a holiday into a consumer tradition. Happy birthday Jesus!
  • I know the next Transformer movie is going to fucking suck. But the trailer looked so fucking cool.
  • Did you know some of your apps are giving your personal information away? Did you know it’s so they can target ads for you? It sucks, but after doing a little more research, these apps aren’t sharing anything more than what you are sharing daily every time you log onto your personal computer. I did delete paper toss however, but mostly because it was boring.
  • Oh, this is the hot chicks room. Filled with assorted hot chicks partying 24 hours a day. Best!
  • Sunday is the best day to be at Walmart exposing yourself to underage chicks… I mean to underage chicks’ moms.
  • This is donated to you. I gave you the gift of life. Well, it was alive when I put it in there. I promise. People are so fucked sometimes. That’s not used clothing. That’s your baby!
  • I could kill you. Oh yea? Well, I could kill you too. Just remember that. Always keep that in the back of your mind. I could kill you at any instant.
  • Burned in a suspected meth lab explosion! 27 years old and getting fucked up by meth lab explosions. He almost got away too. You don’t ever trust the heating ducts. You will always fall through those. Especially while on meth. OOoh Meth!