Ep 514: Orgasmic Birth

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“That is incest at it’s finest.”

Alright! After the Wednesday night episode, the next time you hear from us will be at the start of the first ever Jamhole 24 hour marathon! That’s right, starting Friday, July 15th at 10pm PT. / 1am ET. we’ll be kicking off a huge fun filled awesome 24 hours of Jamhole podcasting entertainment. Why put yourselves through such hell you might be asking? Well, because times are tough and we’re both completely broke. We also have a live audience show coming up Saturday July 23rd at the University of Wisconsin in Milwaukee. We have our plane tickets, but that’s it, and we are going to need some funds to make this trip possible. So make sure you join us for as much of the 24 hours as you can, we’ll be selling cool custom Jamhole T-shirts, some limited edition stuff, and so much more. All the information can be found in the Jamhole forums, or on the Jamhole Facebook page. If you were putting this off to see what the deal is, time is running out. Don’t miss out on this party, it’s our third one in a row, and it’s going to be EPIC! In the win way, not the fail way.

– Danni starts the show off strong with a nice classy burp. Robby joins us again for the Monday episode. I know I’m behind on the Jamhole guest list, but if you want to see all the people we have had on the show, that’s a good place to start.

– We’re also getting ready for the first ever Jamhole 24 hour marathon. This is going to be a fucking blast. We’re podcasting for 24 hours straight starting with the Friday episode at 10pm PT. / 1am ET. and going all the way through until Saturday at 11pm our time. We live in Montana, in case you were wondering what our time is.

– Please allow me to introduce you to the wide world of sports… and when I say sports, I mean orgasmic birth… and when I say wide, I mean dilated. The comments are the best part, makes sure to vote up the good ones! But seriously, more power to you if you can reach an orgasm while pushing out a twat turd, but that doesn’t really seem in line with the teachings of Jesus H. Christ. Basically, this is borderline child porn. Just saying…

– Are you married to a cheating whore? Want to know where your insignificant other is going at all hours of the night? Well, fear no more! If you live in New Jersey (an appropriate start), it is now completely legal to stalk the love of your life with a GPS unit. NICE! If you are dating a geek / nerd, you can already assume you are being tracked. He lied to you, Google Latitude isn’t a game!

– Pour out a little liquor, in due time. But for now, we can all take solace in the fact that Harold Camping had a stroke, and is now in a nursing home. Can anyone figure out what nursing home he is in, and get the phone number for us, so that we can call him and praise him for his amazing work with the lord on the 24 hour marathon? That would be fucking epic!

– Let’s pour out a little non alcoholic liquor for Betty Ford. She had a good run, and really did help a lot of people. Addiction isn’t a criminal problem, it’s a societal / medical problem. She had that shit figured out a long ass time ago. I’m not sure why our government hasn’t figured it out yet.

– New Orleans, WTF? This is why we need to institute the buddy system in some states. You have people putting tiny, little sad kittens into bags. Then they are throwing the tiny little sad kittens out of the truck, and onto the highway. What the fuck Eastern New Orleans? This is not acceptable human behavior.

– When you threaten a woman, any thing can be used as a weapon. Just like the cops use our words against us, women will use a nasty ass used tampon against you! This is why men make more money than women. Because women have gross little strings hanging out of their vaginas.

– So let me get this straight, marijuana is illegal, and alcohol is legal, assuming you are 21 and over. So this guy managed to get disemboweled at a bar, meanwhile, everyone who smoked pot that night was just fine. Unless of course they got arrested, but hey, that’s not the plants’ fault, it’s the government’s fault. Stop being such a fucking idiot and legalize cannabis so we can move on with our lives. You are NOT going to win this pointless drug war.

– The railroad system to me, seems like a very simple system. I do NOT understand how trains get into head on (apply directly to the forehead, head on, apply directly to the forehead! AHHHH FUCK!), accidents so often. If you have one train going one way, don’t put another train going the opposite way on the same tracks. Every time this happens I will make fun of it, because it should never happen. Nice work India!

The Catholic church is doing a little skeleton in the closet spring cleaning. They are going to release a shit load of documents and internal files dating back to 1945. I’m sure they redacted any incriminating evidence, but hey, it’s the Catholic Church, we have all the evidence we could ever need.

BYTE is BACK! That’s right, Byte launched on Monday, July 11th 2011 in beta, and it’s been getting everything squared away since. If you want to read my quick How To on Google Chrome click to play plugins, you can check it out right here! That’s right people, my first ever article as a BYTE senior contributor. I’m very excited and proud to be a part of this. Thanks BYTE! Follow my tech Twitter @ ByteMat if you are a geek like me.

– Remember, we’re doing our first ever 24 hour Jamhole marathon live on Jamhole TV starting with the Friday episode at 11pm our time, going all the way until Saturday at 11pm our time. Join us! Information can be found in the Jamhole Forums and the Jamhole Facebook page under the EVENTS section. If you want to participate but can’t make it here in person, we will be taking phone / Skype calls. Call 1-406.204.4687 or Skype thejamhole.

– Saturday July 23rd is the Milwaukee live audience show with us, the guys from Stereo Radiation, part of Am I bugging You, and of course our gracious host, Redfox from Sporkroast. How many of these podcasts are still kicking ass and taking names? Just the Jamhole I’m afraid. Just the Jamhole…

– Our third annual Jamhole live show here in the Flathead Valley is kicking off the week of August 8th – 13th. The rustic electricity free cabin camping is Tuesday and Wednesday August 9th and 10th. The whitewater rafting trip is Thursday August 11th, then the third annual live show is Saturday August 13th. All of the information can be found here on the Jamhole forums, and here on the Jamhole Facebook page. Tell your friends and help us spread the love. Also, if you are planning on joining us for the cabin camping / rafting trip, you MUST get a hold of me and let me know. There is limited availability, so we need to make sure those who are coming from out of state get their seat. Either text me at 406.848,1739, email info@thejamhole.com, send us a comment form on the bottom of this page, or post in the forums / Facebook page.

By Finn

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...

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