Ep 317: Twister


“That’s not progress, that’s a lie.”

All good things must come to an end. I’ve been giving this whole moving thing quite a bit of thought. Honestly, I can’t see myself having to start all over again, when I’m doing ok right here. I shouldn’t be selfish though, I should be happy that Danni is going to be able to live where she wants to live. I was angry at first, a tidal wave of abandonment issues washing over me, angry that she would just drop everything and follow her parents back to Florida. Angry because I feel like she is leaving me and the show without a second thought. But like I said, that was me being selfish, and for the most part, I know that I should be happy for her. Life tends to get lived in cycles, or chapters. Every now and then you get to a point in life, where the chapter is finished, and you need to start the next one. We had a great time together, and we will always have those memories, but it seems that it’s time to move on. Of course, I don’t want to spend the rest of my life here in Kalispell Montana, but I’m not quite ready yet to pack it all up and leave. If you listen to the show, you’ll know that the job I have now is the longest I’ve ever kept a job for, and it’s one of those things that only get offered to you once or twice a lifetime. Most people work jobs that don’t even know their name, just another paper pushing number in a computer server somewhere. I’m lucky to have a job that I actually somewhat enjoy doing. In my head, it seems silly to have to start all over again. I would do almost anything for Danni, but packing up everything and moving to follow her parents across the country just isn’t one of those things. It would be different if they were moving somewhere else, but I’ve lived in Florida, and it’s not the climate or locale that I want to call home. Whenever things change, you should always try and make the new better than the old. For instance, when you break up with your girlfriend, you should always try to trade up. Whenever you get a new car, you should always try to pick something a little better than what you were previously driving. I think about it the same way with where you live. If you are going to go through all the trouble of packing up your entire life, to go settle down somewhere new, the new place should be better than the place you were living. If not, then what’s the point? Anyways, I apologize to Danni for being a dick, I’m just upset that I am going to have to find a new girlfriend, and another co host. The two things I hoped to never have to do again. This town doens’t have the best track record for finding a girl that doesn’t have or want to have any children. I just need to make the best out of the time I have left with her, say a prayer to whom it may concern that her parents house doesn’t sell, and look forward to the next chapter in my life.

  • Here’s the news, Danni’s parents are paying her to leave me… Just kidding, they wanted me to come with, but that’s just something I can’t do right now. But who knows, if I could see the future, I wouldn’t be a delivery guy.
  • If you’re a rich fuck, right now is the perfect time to be scoping out new locations.
  • Sure, living off your parents seems like a good idea. It usually never is…
  • Enjoy the show while you can, because the future is uncertain.
  • No offense to anyone in Florida, but it is a breeding ground for lots of things I don’t like. Namely mosquitos and humidity.
  • Thanks for taking time off from the Katg 75 hour marathon to promote their new book, which you can find here. I’m broke, so buy me a copy, maybe it will save our relationship.  By the way, in 75 hours, how many times did Ustream crash for you? It crashes usually twice an hour for us.
  • This must be called a herpe, because that’s what everyone says. Everyone is a comedian lately. Kalispell fun fact: The general manager of Famous Daves allegedly has herpes simplex one. Herpes is never funny.
  • Windows Vista service pack two is a huge fucking liar. I’d rather watch paint dry, at least with paint, I can see the progress. Stop buying your grandparents technology they don’t need. If your grandmother wants to print pictures, she does NOT need an all in one printer scanner copiet etc… She also probably does not need a wireless networked printer either.
  • Mirpox is a real thing, but probably spelled wrong. Just call it onions, celery and carrots for fucks sake. It starts with an “M” and ends with an “X” fuck you.
  • Simon Singh kicking ass and taking names. You were suing him, and now YOU’RE under investigation. OOPS! Bringing down the subluxation scam one chiropractor at a time.
  • The Kirstie Alley diet is a fake front for scientology. Watch out for those fuckers, they are NUTS! Any religion based on Sci Fi is probably bullshit. I smoke crack while I get lipo, no big deal.
  • Ask and you shall receive, especially if you live in Hade. So you didn’t have fresh water, now you have too much! Just goes to show, you can’t please everyone.
  • This man is going to jail for using a shoe camera to peek up skirts. I love technology.
  • What is mozambique coming to when I can’t even take my goat for a walk, without her worrying about getting raped. You owe me a dowry.
  • A quadriplegic man rocks out a little too hard at an AC/DC concert. What do you call a quadripalegic at an AC/DC concert? Fucked! If I ever get to that point in my life, please just put me out of my misery.
  • Get that dead body out of the way, I’m trying to get a two piece! I love the chicken hut. I would pay big bucks no whammies to have been able to witness this mess.
  • Did you know it is not good to take a piss on a downed power line. You get your little dick shocked off. Darwin award nominee perhaps?
  • The M is for money and the D is for diamonds.
  • Daddy, I just got raped, I wish I was dead. So her father stabbed her to death. Thanks daddy! Maybe she didn’t mean literally. It’s a figure of speech.
  • WWJD??!?! Ding dong, it’s the church calling… Check this and all the other what would jamhole do questions at the forums. Gimme that christian side hug! Bird is the word, and the word is LOVE. Next week, we’re going to preach the word of god. What a great idea!
  • If I build it, they will come… In their pants. Leave us a message for the Wednesday show at 406.204.4687 or email info@thejamhole.com.
  • Enjoy the Dodgeball game 2 video, again, thank you to Keith Mcnally. Also, it’s a new month, give us a vote on podcast alley, and make sure you are a member of the forums and the facebook group.

About Mat Lee

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...
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