Ep 440: Good Christmas

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“Mirror mirror on the wall, who received the worst gift of all?”

We’re gonna switch it up tonight and let Danni write something for you all to read. Enjoy!

The new year is almost upon us and if the tales are true then we only have two full years left to live. Only two years to live the lives we want or wish we had. Only two years to love the ones we hold dear and only two years to accomplish whatever it is we expect from a life. What will you do with your remaining time here on this plane of existence? Will you continue to do the things you have been doing all along or will you change your ways and make amends with whoever and whatever you have wronged? Life is short but if this is true then it’s become even shorter. For some, the doomsday coming is welcomed. For those that have lived their lives and are satisfied with the things that have filled it. Then there are people like us, the 20 to 30 somethings that still have things left they want to do. What will we do? Then of course there are the ones that have barley begun to live life, the children. What will they think of it when their parents hold them in their arms with tears in their eyes as they watch the extermination of life? Will the innocent be welcomed back into the loving arms of their creator, God, Christ all mighty, the head of the religion they have been brought up to believe in since their time of birth? If what these innocents believe in, their “religion” is true, when the time comes and the trumpets sound will you beg for god to save your soul so you can be welcomed into his kingdom that lies in the heavens?

Maybe none of it is true and we will all live on for years to come. Either way everyone will make their “new years resolutions” as always. What will yours be? Will your actions be affected by the thought of impending doom or will you just make the normal promises that you do every year? Will you try and go through with them this year or just break them like everyone else? I have a couple things I want to change in my life and if we are all dying in two years I’m going to try to do my best to make the most of it. I wonder if some people will live threw the apocalypse, kind of like those post apocalyptic movies or if everything is wiped clean and we start over with the world covered in water. I really hope it does happen, that way these last years will mean more.

I do have a new years resolution, and that is to listen more, watch closer, live better, and love like I’ve never loved before. So whether you decide to believe that the world is ending in two years or not I hope that whatever you set out to do you are able to achieve it. If not, and you fail miserably then I guess you weren’t trying hard enough, and if that ends up being the case you will always have The Jamhole to fall back on. At least we will read stories of other people with shittier situations than you, and that always makes me feel better… but then again, I’m a cold hearted bitch.

~ Danni ~

  • We magically turned a ring into a netbook. Or something like that. Honestly, it was more like half a netbook. Hey Microsoft, what the fuck were you thinking with windows 7 starter? I can’t change my background? This is very important to me, and because of that, you lost money.
  • Huge thanks to mi madre for getting us a nice brand new HD camera to stream the show in. Does your internet handle the new high quality live feed? Let me know if you have a problem with it and we’ll see what we can do. So now we need one more of these bad boys, help us out with that. Tis the season of giving.
  • Let’s start things off by pouring out a little rest in peace liquor for Jamie. I can’t believe you shot her and her daughter on xmas. That’s some messed up junk and we all hope you get the death penalty. You have proven to be a problem time and time again, so it’s time to end you. Thanks for playing!
  • Merry xmas to everyone in South LA also, where another xmas day shooting went down. Hey, hows your life doing? This one may have been gang related.
  • This isn’t what I demanded you get me for xmas. Can you believe this little bitch actually threw the xmas tree? Talk about bah humbug.
  • Oh give it to me. This spoiled kid should hook up with the spoiled bitch from the previous story. Could you imagine what their children would be like during the holidays? Oh man. Kids these days. This one threw a humidifier.
  • Danni tells us about how she got cow shit for xmas one year. Dad, is this poop? Thanks dad!
  • You beat your aunt to death with an aluminium baseball bat? Damn, that’s gangsta! 8 million dollars cash bail gangsta. Keep in mind if you care, that all of these stories occurred on xmas day. Nice work guys, way to stick together.
  • Remember, only a few more days left to throw some cash in on this donation for our late friend Ryan’s two year old boy Sam. I know you got some extra xmas money laying around. Do something good for a change and let’s make a difference in this kids life. If you ever want to donate to Sam’s fund after December, email info@thejamhole.com and I will give you the information. Thank you so much to everyone that has donated. You guys are awesome!
  • Remember back in the day when people used to kill other people for some mother fucking shoes? Hell yea. The good old days. You got pepper sprayed for some fucking shoes. Niggas make fun of white people for swimming and snowboarding, white people make fun of niggas for mobbing a store for some shoes. It all washes out in the end.
  • Hey China, nice car pile up. If you could see out of your peripheral, you could probably drive better. Ok, that was racist. I’m sorry.
  • Is reading your wife’s email a crime? I’m going to say not in this case. She sounded like a real cunt.
  • Burn her, she’s a zombie. Oh wait, never mind. She’s dead again.
  • Why is your 14 year old running around fucking cops up with machetes? Maybe you should raise your children better.
  • Yes I will fix your computer, if you pay me. Even if you see me in Wrap n Roll. I will not give free tech support over the phone though. You can help motivate me also by buying my breakfast. Thank you. Local and want me to fix your computer for you? Text me at 406.848.1739.
  • Thanks for joining us once again. Email info@thejamhole.com and leave us a message at 406.204.4687. Make sure you are subscribed in Itunes and write us a nice review. It only takes a moment and helps us tremendously. Follow us on Twitter and join the Facebook group. We also have a tumblr and a posterous if you use either of those services.
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