Ep 254: Dead Churches


“My dildo is porn, your dildo is a dildo.”

Dead churches make up the majority of middle to larger sized towns, and we all know what’s inside dead churches. Dead people. Actually not dead in the sense the heartbeat stops and we bury you in the ground (or cremate you and put you in a little urn if you care about not wasting land for ridiculous¬†cemeteries). I’m talking about dead in the sense the life you live might be ok, but when you die, if you are aware for any part of it, you will be so pist off that everything you believed in the whole seventy to eighty years you’ve lived, has been complete and utter bullshit. I think all of these “dead churches” would serve more purpose being converted into homeless shelters, or better yet, laser tag facilities. Fuck people, I would love to own a huge church structure where we live and record The Jamhole, and have wicked awesome party super parties in! Whatever happened to humble thyself before god? Oh right, I forgot, when you’re religious like that, you get to pick and choose what you do and do not follow, making me give even a ¬†fuck less about your bullshit belief system. It basically boils down to this. You are completely fucking up our society and the very planet we live on. Knock it the fuck off. Thank you…

  • GENITALIA!!!!! Here is the picture that made danni cry before the show. Enjoy!
  • Get us nominated for the 2009 Podcast Awards. The info is here. The Jamhole, mature category. Thank you.
  • Check the sweet pictures from the 250th episode party weekend. Huge thanks to McNalley for putting the video together. Coming soon!
  • Skunks smell poopy. Even the dead ones.
  • Put your stupid little dogs away when you know the delivery guy is coming. Next time it bites me I won’t be so nice.
  • Also, do me a favor and leave your dogs at home. They don’t need to be running your errands with you just because your life sucks and you are lonely.
  • Petting bucks because I’m a retard. Here’s the pics. Past the high res bloody cyst pictures :) You’re welcome!
  • Hook a brotha up on his birthday. Check the wishlist!
  • Hey, can I have the bedroom for like five minutes? I need to finish up. Sex advice with Shazam! She knows what’s up, after all, she is living with her ex husband and his girlfriend.
  • The 25th Hour, a Spike Lee joint. Pretty good stuff. I just realized this came out back in 2002. That’s my bad.
  • Jesus is going to kill Harry Potter. Do not ever glorify a warlock. They are demons from hell. Check out the jesus camp movie we discussed. It will blow your fucking mind. Christ Triumphant church, you are on fucking crack!
  • Can we talk about drugs now? Did you hear america has a pretty decent drug addiction problem?
  • Don’t be a statistic, mixing benzos and opiates and alcohol will kill you. I could have been a sad statistic, but I was smarter than that. Kind of…
  • Hey junkies, good luck with the new oxycontin formula. Here’s the update on the story. Have fun with that.
  • It’s pretty awesome doctors can prescribe opiates for as many patients as they want, but when it comes time to get the patients off the opiates, they have a limit on how may people they can treat with suboxone. How the fuck does that work?
  • If you live in denver, you could be the weed dispensary reviewer. What a sweet fucking job.
  • Coons Vs. Near Deads Round 1. Fight!
  • This is your sacred marriage tradition. Vampires? Are you fucking kidding me? People suck… heh.

By Finn

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...

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