Ep 263: Butthole Pucker


“For some reason they always want head in my crouch.”

It continues to blow my mind on a daily basis the things you so called civilized rational humans accept as truth. For one, I find it quite sad that you are willing to blow thousands of dollars on bullshit homeopathic remedies, yet you get all up in arms when the schools that educate your children need more money. For two, you are afraid to vaccinate your children because you’ve heard that either vaccines cause autism, the h1nword vaccine hasn’t been tested thoroughly enough yet, or the newest piece of negative press, that the flu vaccine causes dystonia. Are you fucking kidding me people? It’s retards like you that make me glad I don’t want any kids. I would be so fucking pist if I had a child and it had to interact with all your idiot kids. You can barely make good decisions for yourselves, yet you think you can properly raise children? It’s people like you that are ruining this beautiful planet we live on. So go ahead, keep wasting your money on placebos, or throwing it into the tax free black hole that is the church. If this 2012 thing is really going to happen, it will be by your hand and your actions. It blows my mind that some of you have managed to survive this long. You are very lucky the world is littered with so much¬†convenience, otherwise you’d be just another fossil buried in the monkey muck.

  • Let’s welcome Smashly back to the jamhole. Thank you for bringing your germs into my home.
  • Stop bringing your dogs to work. Also, I’m not sure if you know this or not, but dogs are not children. Unless it came out of your twat, it’s not your child. Hey sales guy, how are your nuts?
  • Also, don’t leave your dogs in your car, that’s not what they are for.
  • What’s more sad than playing world of warcraft? Sitting on Ustream with 9,000 other people watching someone play world of warcraft.
  • Hey Danni, when’s the last time you pooped?
  • Busting two nuts in under eight minutes. Thank you University Gangbang 2!
  • In our little economy we have here, blow jobs are the currency. Someone (read danni) is in quite a bit of debt.
  • If the fleshlight could get up and clean itself off, it would be the perfect girlfriend.
  • Just sit back, open your mouth, and I’ll do the rest. Because I care.
  • Smashley tells the story about the time she got caught peeing outside by her daddy the night of the 250 episode… At four in the morning. Then she tells the story about her cocksucking pieces of shit neighbors that snitched on her and got her evicted. Snitches get stitches, that’s just how it goes… Watch your back snitches.
  • When the new Slayer album comes out November 3rd, you should all get it. World Painted Blood is fucking awesome! They are old, but they still fucking rule!
  • Hey skype, fix your spam problem. Thank you.
  • Why is everyone in Kalispell buying herbal sex supplements from the gas station? Because they all have tiny dicks.
  • Are you circumcised or not? Take the poll. Girls, which do you prefer? Email info@thejamhole.com and share your scary penis stories.
  • 2012 Supernova and Polar Storm. I really enjoy movies that show the world getting completely destroyed. I really hope the new 2012 movie does it better than these did.
  • The latest poster child for the antivaccine movement. Nice reporting newspapers, maybe next time you’ll get it right.
  • Hey Minnesota, what the fuck is wrong with you? Did you seriously make possession of bongwater a felony? Take a look around, other states are decriminalizing marijuana, meanwhile, your making it more illegal. Good job retards!
  • Sad kittens, wrapped in duct tape. You don’t know, maybe this was a kitty like in pet¬†cemetery. They always come back.
  • Even Canada is starting to feel the oxycontin problem. Hey everyone that is prescribed good painkillers, stop being so fucking greedy, or next time your crippled ass might get knocked the fuck out.
  • If you are making the switch from oxycontin to heroin, be careful with your shit. You might find yourself overdosing at Mcdonalds in the Philly ghetto.
  • The best ending to a jamhole episode ever! Thanks Danni!

About Mat Lee

Creating dope shit since the chromosome split...
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