Tag Archives: oxycontin

TJH 668: Jellyfish and Junkies

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“You guys are basically mutating little hulks.”

BJ and Mat back with another episode for the month of August. That’s right bitches, that’s two this month so count that shit up. I don’t really have anything else to say other than place your bets, pack your pipes and get ready for some more ridiculous nonsensical banter.

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TJH 601: Work the Math

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“Take your dentures out.”

Not quite as amazing as episode 600 in title, but more so in content. This is episode 601 of the Jamhole. Thanks for checking out our weekly “comedy” show. Mat Lee here with Duncan Puffer talking stupid shit about stupid shit. It’s 4/19, do you have a minute? I’m sure everyone is going to have a fun 420, except for the fact that it completely rained and snowed on us for ours here in the northwest. That’s how it goes right. Could have been worse, we could have been in Denver at the pot rally people starting shooting at. We talk about that on a new episode of the Hot Box. Anyway, this is the Jamhole, and here are some notes.

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Ep 263: Butthole Pucker

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“For some reason they always want head in my crouch.”

It continues to blow my mind on a daily basis the things you so called civilized rational humans accept as truth. For one, I find it quite sad that you are willing to blow thousands of dollars on bullshit homeopathic remedies, yet you get all up in arms when the schools that educate your children need more money. For two, you are afraid to vaccinate your children because you’ve heard that either vaccines cause autism, the h1nword vaccine hasn’t been tested thoroughly enough yet, or the newest piece of negative press, that the flu vaccine causes dystonia. Are you fucking kidding me people? It’s retards like you that make me glad I don’t want any kids. I would be so fucking pist if I had a child and it had to interact with all your idiot kids. You can barely make good decisions for yourselves, yet you think you can properly raise children? It’s people like you that are ruining this beautiful planet we live on. So go ahead, keep wasting your money on placebos, or throwing it into the tax free black hole that is the church. If this 2012 thing is really going to happen, it will be by your hand and your actions. It blows my mind that some of you have managed to survive this long. You are very lucky the world is littered with so much convenience, otherwise you’d be just another fossil buried in the monkey muck.

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Ep 257: Best Produced

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“I don’t believe in evidence, I believe in magic and rainbows.”

The world teeters on the brink of complete destruction as we quickly approach a total world population of seven billion people. I feel like this might be a tad too many for our planet to support. The scary thing is, that even though we know we are running out of space, resources, and patience, people still insist on reproducing to an extreme degree. I know that everyone thinks the whole point of life is to have as many children as you possibly can before your dick falls off and your womb dries out, but if we want to really survive the fast approaching complete break down of society as we know it, some changes have to be made. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but maybe it’s time people stop having four, five, and even six kids per family. Maybe just for now, until we figure out where to put all you animals, we try to limit ourselves to one child, two at the maximum. We have made amazing breakthroughs in birth control, so don’t worry, you can still fuck till your little heart is content without giving birth once a year. Please, for the future of the children you all have already brought into this world, and for the rest of us who will live quite happy lives not having any children, stifle your seed. Either wrap it up, or feed that vagina some birth control. Your planet will thank you. If, of course, you decide not to heed my warning, then you can expect more pandemics to run wild in our society. Let’s just call it natures way of auto balancing the load.

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Ep 254: Dead Churches

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“My dildo is porn, your dildo is a dildo.”

Dead churches make up the majority of middle to larger sized towns, and we all know what’s inside dead churches. Dead people. Actually not dead in the sense the heartbeat stops and we bury you in the ground (or cremate you and put you in a little urn if you care about not wasting land for ridiculous cemeteries). I’m talking about dead in the sense the life you live might be ok, but when you die, if you are aware for any part of it, you will be so pist off that everything you believed in the whole seventy to eighty years you’ve lived, has been complete and utter bullshit. I think all of these “dead churches” would serve more purpose being converted into homeless shelters, or better yet, laser tag facilities. Fuck people, I would love to own a huge church structure where we live and record The Jamhole, and have wicked awesome party super parties in! Whatever happened to humble thyself before god? Oh right, I forgot, when you’re religious like that, you get to pick and choose what you do and do not follow, making me give even a  fuck less about your bullshit belief system. It basically boils down to this. You are completely fucking up our society and the very planet we live on. Knock it the fuck off. Thank you…

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